Iron-Sharpening Friendships in the Bible

IRON SHARPENS IRON: March 27, 2023

Welcome back! For the past few weeks, I've been doing a blog series breaking down key takeaways from the "Iron Sharpens Iron" message from the Warrior Women's Conference. We've looked at what it means to sharpen iron, what happens when we do/don't sharpen iron, and this week, we'll look at two female friendships in the Bible that best exemplify what iron sharpening iron looks like.

We’re going to first start in the book of Ruth.

As soon as we open chapter 1, the story begins with tragedy. We meet a woman named Naomi. She’s married with two sons who both have wives. Her husband and both her sons die, leaving her with her two daughters-in-law, Orpah and Ruth. They were living in Moab, but she now needs to journey back to Bethlehem and live there. She basically tells Orpah and Ruth, “Y’all stay here and find husbands. You’re young, you have your whole life ahead of you." Essentially saying, “I’ll just hold you back.”

"Return home, my daughters. Why would you come with me? Am I going to have any more sons, who could become your husbands? Return home, my daughters; I am too old to have another husband. Even if I thought there was still hope for me -- even if I had a husband tonight and then gave birth to sons -- would you wait until they grew up? Would you remain unmarried for them? No, my daughters. It is more bitter for me than for you, because the Lord's hand has turned against me!" (v.11-13)

It's clear here that Naomi is DOWN. She is feeling low and going as far as to say, "The Lord's hand has turned against me." Immediately, Orpah takes her up on this offer to go and leaves. She kissed Naomi goodbye, while it says Ruth clung to Naomi.

In verse 16, Ruth really hones into her devotion for her mother-in-law. She says, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go, I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if even death separates you and me.”

What I see in this passage is: “Uh uh girl, I’m NOT going to leave you as you go through the hardest point in your life.” This woman, Naomi, needs someone to come alongside her and say, “I know you’re going through a hard time, but we are in this together.” That’s what Ruth is here to do.

As you continue to read, the two women settle in Bethlehem and heavily rely on each other for encouragement and companionship. Then, a man named Boaz enters the picture, and he is smitten with Ruth. He just so happens to be a relative to Naomi. He starts asking around and learns Ruth’s story and how she has committed to staying with Naomi and caring for her.

Word is getting around about Ruth’s devotion to this special woman in her life. How she is choosing to do life with her. One day, Ruth asks Naomi if she can go glean in the fields. Essentially, it’s what the poor would do in those days — go behind the harvesters and picking up whatever scraps were left behind.

The Bible says in chapter 2, verse 3 — “she happened to be in the portion of land belonging to Boaz.”

Some might say that’s a coincidence, I say that’s divine appointment. That’s God putting her exactly where she needs to be.

The Bible describes Boaz as a prominent man of noble character. Boaz, showing his noble character, goes up to her and tells her he wants her to stay safe. He tells her to stay with his female servants and follow them around. He also tells her whenever you’re thirsty, go fill up your jar over there.

Ruth is obviously very confused by this stranger’s generosity and asks in verse 10: “Why are you so kind to notice me, although I am a foreigner?”

He tells her in verse 11 & 12 of chapter 2: “Everything you have done for your mother-in-law since your husband’s death has been fully reported to me: how you left your father and mother and the land of your birth, and how you came to a people you didn’t previously know. May the Lord reward you for what you have done, and may you receive a full reward from the Lord God of Israel, under whose wings you have come for refuge.”

It goes onto to talk about how he invited her to a huge meal, and how she brought home tons and tons of barley for her and Naomi. When she gets home, Ruth tells Naomi all about her day. When she tells her the name of this man who was of such noble character, Naomi immediately recognizes that he’s a relative.

In Verse 20, Naomi says: “May he be blessed by the Lord, who had not forsaken his kindness to the living or the dead.”

There's a little attitude change in Naomi here. She’s got a little pep in her step. She’s no longer

bitter at God for, as she said, “pronouncing judgement on her.” But rather she recognizes that God has not forsaken them. That the story isn’t over for them — it’s just beginning.

The roles start to evolve a little bit. Naomi begins to take on the role of a mentor to Ruth. She helps Ruth in courting Boaz and gives her little nuggets on what to wear and actions to take to get him to become the family redeemer. Spoiler alert: Boaz and Ruth marry and she gives birth to a son named Obed — bringing such joy and comfort to Naomi.

Chapter 4, Verse 14-15 says: “Then the women said to Naomi, ‘Praise the Lord, who had not left you without a family redeemer today. May his name become well known in Israel. He will renew your life and sustain you in your old age. Indeed, your daughter-in-law, who loves you and is better to you than seven sons, has given birth to him.”

The book of Ruth ends with a short genealogy lesson: Boaz fathered Obed, Obed fathered Jesse, Jesse fathered David. David. As in David and Goliath David. As in King David. As in David whose lineage leads to Jesus Christ. A royal lineage!

So what do we learn in this story about how iron sharpens iron? Simply put -- these women needed each other. Naomi needed someone to pick her up when she was at her lowest point. Ruth needed someone to guide her in the pursuit of her relationship with Boaz. Young women who are freshly dating a guy or newly married have a lot to learn from women who have been married for decades.

Going off of that, another lesson here is that you don’t just have to sharpen the iron of someone your age or in the same life season as you. There is beauty in learning and growing in relationships with women where there is difference in age and background. Naomi and Ruth took turns sharpening each other’s iron, just like how we go through seasons with our friendships and relationships. You may be up real high when your friend is way down low. That’s when you have to come alongside them and pull them up with encouragement, with scripture, with promises straight from the Bible and with prayer.

Iron sharpens iron.

Now, let’s move to the New Testament to a friendship we learn about in Luke 1.

Mary had just been visited by the angel Gabriel who dropped the bomb that she was going to conceive and give birth to a son and that his name would be Jesus and he would be the Son of the Most High.

Now, not only did Mary just find out that she was going to become pregnant without ever having been with a man BUT this was the Son of God?! The angel knew that she was confused and that she didn’t understand how this could be possible.

Luke 1:36 –37 says, “And consider your relative Elizabeth – even she has conceived a son in her old age, and this is the sixth month for her who was called childless.”

The next verse is so simple and so powerful. It says – “For nothing will be impossible with God.”

Mary and Elizabeth were two special women. The Bible says Elizabeth was “righteous in God’s sight” and it says Mary “found favor with God.” Shortly after receiving this life-changing news, Mary took a little trip to visit Elizabeth and her husband Zechariah.

Verse 41-45 says that “When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby leaped inside her, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. Then she exclaimed with a loud cry: You are the most blessed of women, and your child will be blessed! How could this happen to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? For you see, when the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the baby leaped for joy inside me! She who has believed is blessed because what was spoken to her by the Lord will be fulfilled!”

What stands out to me the most is that when Elizabeth said all this – she had a heart of joy, of excitement and of praise. There was no envy or jealousy seeing that she had struggled to get pregnant, and Mary had gotten pregnant LITERALLY without even trying. But no, she laid all the praise hands on her cousin Mary, encouraging and lifting her up at a time I’m sure was petrifying for young Mary.

I’m sure up until this point, yes, Mary was reliant on God to be with her during this time, but I know there had to be fear, there had to be worry and anxiety about what people would think. About how she would explain this to her fiancé Joseph. About how to raise the Son of God. But after hearing how joyful and encouraging and excited Elizabeth was for her, Mary immediately gives praise to the Lord:

Luke 1:46-49 says “And Mary said: My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord, and my spirit has rejoiced in God my Savior, because He has looked with favor on the humble condition of His slave. Surely, from now on all generations will call me blessed, because the Mighty One has done great things for me, and His name is holy.”

Her attitude changed. She was encouraged. She was lifted up by Elizabeth.

Iron sharpens iron.

Thank you for reading this third installment in the blog series "Iron Sharpens Iron." Next time, I'll break down what being a warrior woman looks like and why it's so important to get out on the battlefield and share your testimony.